You planned to tame a swallow, to hold her
In the long summer of your love so that she would forget
Not the raw seasons alone, and the homes left behind, but
Also her nature, the urge to fly, and the endless
Pathways of the sky. It was not to gather knowledge
Of yet another man that I came to you but to learn
What I was, and by learning, to learn to grow, but every
Lesson you gave was about yourself. You were pleased
With my body’s response, its weather, its usual shallow
Convulsions. You dribbled spittle into my mouth, you poured
Yourself into every nook and cranny, you embalmed
My poor lust with your bitter-sweet juices. You called me wife,
I was taught to break saccharine into your tea and
To offer at the right moment the vitamins. Cowering
Beneath your monstrous ego I ate the magic loaf and
Became a dwarf. I lost my will and reason, to all your
Questions I mumbled incoherent replies. The summer
Begins to pall. I remember the rudder breezes
Of the fall and the smoke from the burning leaves. Your room is
Always lit by artificial lights, your windows always
Shut. Even the air-conditioner helps so little,
All pervasive is the male scent of your breath. The cut flowers
In the vases have begun to smell of human sweat. There is
No more singing, no more dance, my mind is an old
Playhouse with all its lights put out. The strong man’s technique is
Always the same, he serves his love in lethal doses,
For, love is Narcissus at the water’s edge, haunted
By its own lonely face, and yet it must seek at last
An end, a pure, total freedom, it must will the mirrors
To shatter and the kind night to erase the water.

“The Old Playhouse” by Kamala Das is a powerful and poignant exploration of the disillusionment and emotional turmoil experienced by the speaker in her married life. The phrase “The Old Playhouse,” in and of itself, turns into a key metaphor for the speaker’s emotional and mental state being neglected and degraded inside her marriage.

The woman accuses her husband of domesticating her after marriage and of wanting to “tame a swallow” in the opening line of the poem. The speaker’s sense of imprisonment and loss of freedom is alluded to by the comparison to a swallow. “Lights put out” emphasises the negative effects of the marriage on the speaker’s mental health by conveying a sense of gloom and desolation.

The speaker berates her spouse for treating her as if her only purpose in the marriage was to provide physical fulfilment and no emotional bond. She asserts that the goal of the marriage was to uncover her actual self rather than to acquire wisdom or enlightenment. Her husband’s egotism, however, has dashed her dreams of personal development and self-discovery.

The horror of the speaker’s marriage, where she feels overwhelmed by her husband’s enormous ego, is explored in the third section. The wording that refers to being viewed as a “object of sexual gratification” and the loss of identity creates a dismal impression of how dehumanising the relationship is.

The speaker characterises the last part of her life as a “stand-still” time that was characterised by a void and a lack of purpose. The image of a “Old Playhouse” shrouded in total darkness serves as a metaphor for her emotional and mental decline and neglect. The portrayal of the husband’s lovemaking as deadly and mechanical adds to the general depressing atmosphere.

Throughout the poem, Kamala Das employs vivid and suggestive imagery to convey the disastrous effects of a mismatched marriage. The sparrow, summer, autumn, and the old playhouse serve as powerful metaphors, each contributing to the layered exploration of the speaker’s emotional and psychological turmoil. The poem is a poignant critique of the oppressive nature of a patriarchal marriage and the profound impact it can have on an individual’s sense of self-worth and identity.